A Fashion Blogger With M.E

a fashion blogger with M.E

There are a lot of you out there who have followed my fashion blogger journey since it began in 2010, which I am incredibly grateful for, and there are so many of you who joined me a couple of years, months, weeks or even a few days ago. Since my blog is so personal to me and I feel like we have built up a little community here which I trust and feel safe with, I wanted to explain to you something about my life that I have kept hidden from my blog all this time. This wasn’t because I didn’t trust anyone or because I’m ashamed, it was mainly because I wanted to make sure I could succeed in doing what I wanted to do without any sympathy votes or without it having an impact on my progress. 5 years have gone by now and I’m ready to explain things to you all, now that I know it wont have an impact on my blogging life and work.

I have M.E. Kind of similar to CFS (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome), but a lot more symptoms are involved.

I started getting ill with glandular fever when I was about 12/13 years old and after months, it had developed into M.E. I was going back and forth between hospital and doctors appointments for just over a year, trying to figure out what was wrong with me but after countless tests, studies, examinations and everything else, nobody really knew what was wrong. I found another doctor to visit and she ended up being my life saver. After a month or two of seeing her, we found out that I had M.E and that’s what was causing my problems and making me so ill, tired and sick all the time. It wasn’t until I was almost 15 that I was diagnosed, which was a crucial age for me with my exams coming up in school.

I actually ended up missing half of my last year of school, I missed most of my GCSE exams and was graded mostly on my coursework that I had managed to do. Luckily for me, I still got quite a few good grades which was helpful, but it was such a horrible time for me. Missing so much school because I couldn’t get out of bed or function properly was a disaster. I was a tomboy growing up which meant I lived outside playing football, basketball, riding my bike or skateboard etc and I wouldn’t have had it any other way. So having that stripped away from me which also meant that I lost a lot of my friends was the worst time of my life. Things truly got so bad back then that I was at my wits end and I spiraled into severe depression and anxiety. My current living arrangements back then didn’t help me at all, but my mum and dad have always been extremely supportive, as well as my nan and grandad, so having people around me who cared for me really did help me pull through those dark times.

I’m 27 in a couple of weeks so I have had the M.E now for almost 14 years, but I will say as time goes on and after pacing myself correctly, learning to cope with it, knowing what I can and can’t do etc really does help. I mainly wanted to make this post to let other people with M.E out there know that it’s not the end of your life. I met someone online a few months back who is having the worst time with her M.E right now, but I want so many of you to know that it will get better. You may not feel like it will, and gosh knows all those years ago when I couldn’t get out of bed I didn’t think it would, but it does. I promise. It just takes time and patience and that amount of time varies from individual to individual. I’ve met people who got better in 2 years, I’ve met people who only started to feel better after 20 years, and a whole range in-between. But the outcome is the same and that is that it’s not forever. Learning this is what got me through. Staying mentally strong is important.

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Sunsets On The Beach

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A flowing black dress on the beach

Here’s one of the first sets of photos that we shot on the beach in St. Ives a couple of weeks ago. I’m sure you already know by now after seeing my St. Ives photos, just how gorgeous of a location it was, so shooting a look on the beach was an honour! I’ve never really done beach locations before due to where I live and not being anywhere near, so doing something different like this was fantastic. We made sure we were approaching the golden hour in the evening too, just as the sun was setting so that the lighting was perfect, with that gorgeous glow. I think I can safely say that these are some of my favourite photos we have ever shot!

In terms of my outfit, I can’t say that I was wearing many pieces as I only had on my RARE Hi Lo dress which is one of my favourites, my Olivia Burton butterfly watch and my Ray-Ban mirror pink aviator sunglasses. I didn’t have any shoes on as I wanted to really embrace the beach living, including having air dried hair all day to really get that beach waves look. Unfortunately the sea was freezing at that time in the evening though so I didn’t take many photos in it, but we did get a couple! After this set, I still have two more looks that we shot on holiday, so I can’t wait to share those with you this week! I truly can’t wait to go back to St. Ives and I really hope you like these photos as much as I do!

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(Dress – Similar & Similar, Sunglasses – Exact, Watch – Similar)

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I’ll Be Your Twiggy Little Dancer

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James Jeans Twiggy Dancer with a peplum top and clutch

Something a little more classic and what you are used to from me? That’s what I went for with this outfit that I’ve put together with Revolve Clothing! I really can’t get enough of classic pieces, especially when it comes to skinny, flattering jeans that just look amazing. I’ve got a new found passion for black jeans at the moment as I think they are really slimming and chic, but I don’t always want a plain, solid pair, which is why I chose these James Jeans Twiggy Dancer Jeans in Black Flex Distressed. I have another pair of Twiggy Dancers in a dark blue (see here), but I think these are my favourite. They are so comfortable that you can literally do yoga in them like the campaign images show, but at the same time, they are just as flattering as their Twiggy jeans! They truly are fantastic for both comfort and fit!

I paired the jeans with a BCBG Max Azria Lyna peplum tank in white lace as I thought it would look really pretty. I’m pretty sure you already know just how much I adore peplum and this one featuring lace voile print on it is even better! I wasn’t sure on my sizing for this one so I took an S and it actually fits really well. It’s stretchy too so there’s no restriction. There’s just something about the shape of peplum that I find really flattering on a woman’s figure, it truly enhances the curves of the hips and hides any lumps and bumps that might be on show!

So now that I had the black and white base down, it was time for accessories. I chose this Rebecca Minkoff Leo clutch in orange as I thought it might make a nice change to the usual red and pink that goes with black and white. I was right as I like the subtle difference it gives the outfit. It gives it more of a sophisticated vibe in my opinion. Keeping with the orange theme, I also chose a Ettika 3 chain braided friendship bracelet to match. Both these pieces go extremely well together as you can see! Finally, to give my legs some height, I opted for my Christian Louboutin Pigalle 100 in Black.

I’m really loving my hair shorter now too. You might have noticed that I did get some highlights put in for the Summer, as it looks quite a lot blonder now than it did before. I was unsure at first on the highlights as I felt like my hair was much too blonde for my complexion, but I have since got used to it. The only negative I will say is that I think from the back, my hair looked better longer, but from the front, it looks better shorter. Ha ha! I left it natural in these photos too as they were shot when we got back off holiday, in which I had let it dry naturally on the beach, so it’s kind of wavy and messy. So, that’s my outfit for this blog post. What do you think?

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( Jeans – Exact & Similar, Top – Exact, Clutch – Exact, Bracelet – Exact, Shoes – Exact)

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My New Chanel Paint Splatter Canvas Espadrilles

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Chanel Canvas Espadrilles in Paint Splatter

I am literally SO excited to finally own a pair of Chanel espadrilles! Most of you know that I have been on the search for them since April 2014 (or before) but had no luck what so ever. Every time I checked the boutiques in London they had none in my size and each time I called them (which was a lot) there were always none in stock. I was really beginning to lose faith about ever getting hold of a pair of the black and white canvas fabric espadrilles, until a couple of weeks ago!

I check eBay about 15 times a day for the newly listed Chanel espadrilles to make sure I’m not missing out on any in my size popping up. Most of them are ridiculously expensive on there though, going for over £500 when they retail for around £300 so it’s insane how big the demand is for them. Luckily, two or so weeks ago, these beauties popped up and so did a pair of the classic canvas ones in black and white at the same time. I was torn between the two, but my mind was made up for me when the price of the classics I had been wanting had shot over £400 already. I was sat in Prezzo having lunch during the time this auction for the paint splatter pair was ending, so I was frantically keeping an eye on the listing and bidding within the last few seconds.

I felt a sigh of relief when I found out I had won the auction though! Granted I did end up paying about £360 for them, which is a bit over their retail price, but considering how long I have been waiting and the fact I can never find these anywhere, I consider it a win! Don’t worry, I made sure they were authentic as I would never buy fakes! The seller was actually lovely, she was measuring them for me and answering my questions, she even said she would mail me the Chanel shopping bag, ribbons and the receipt too, which was fantastic.

So, I waited for mail day! I didn’t have to wait too long actually, only about 2-3 days, but I was waiting with much anticipation. I had been so worried that they wouldn’t fit me as I had read on TPF that these ones ran particularly small because of the fabric. When I got them, and unwrapped all the prettiness, I put them on and I was really heartbroken. They were so tight that they were making my feet numb, cutting in across the top of my feet and digging at the back. These are a size 40 and I am generally between a 39/40 in shoes, so these definitely do run small, that much was true.

I wore them around the house, trying to put the pain aside to try and stretch them as I didn’t want to give up and sell them. The chances of me finding these again in a 41 are even more slim! So, after much perseverance over the next few days, using socks and a hairdryer to heat the shoes up and then stretch them out, they finally fit a lot better. I will say they are still tight though, but they have loosened up a lot. They are no longer so painful that I can’t move my feet properly and they are just a bit uncomfortable. I know with more wear that they will stretch even more as they are leather lined and my friends did, so I’m holding out hope for them becoming one of my pairs of comfy shoes soon!

What’s actually funny though is that I never really gave the paint splatter Chanel espadrilles a second look before now. I always thought they might look like (for lack of a better term) birds had pooped on the front of the shoes, but in person, they are literally gorgeous. I think the splatter detail actually makes them look more unique and quirky, plus I love the waffle detail on the white canvas as it feels sturdier. Any reservations I had about this design were instantly gone as soon as I saw them and held them. I think I might like them a little more than the classic plain ones now actually!

I really can’t wait to wear them out properly and enjoy them. I know to some of you it may seem strange getting so excited over a pair of shoes, but I think it’s the fact that I have wanted them for that long and finally managed to get them. It’s more like an achievement and it helps that the espadrilles are stunning too! What do you think of my new Chanel espadrilles? I’d love to know if you own a pair actually and how they fit! I know the leather ones tend to run a bit bigger than the canvas as they stretch out loads. I have tried the navy leather in the boutique, but I didn’t get on with those ones as much. I prefer the canvas! Anyway, let me know! You can find similar pairs on eBay too.

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